I will die if light touches me.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
