I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize