Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
I don't want to jinx anything but I may have found the one.
Cat or human?
Human
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize