Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
i will never coherently bang her
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
