sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
