I think i sorta joined a cult last night
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Randomize
