sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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