Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
Randomize
