Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Randomize
