Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
