i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Randomize
