I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
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