D3 body, D1 cock
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
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