why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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