she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Randomize
