I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
