"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize