he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
