Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
