I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
