For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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