in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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