and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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