I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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