please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
