she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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