yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
