i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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