im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Randomize
