I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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