Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
