the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
