ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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