So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
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