Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
