just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Randomize
