Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize