I want to have your abortion
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
