He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
