Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize
