There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
I'm really busy with my period
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