She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
IM ON THE WEIRD DRUGS AND I JUST SAW THAT TOM HARDY THING NOW I WANT TO HUMP
Randomize
