what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
Randomize
