If i come over, it means nothing
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Randomize