So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
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