If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
