Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
You work out of a Hotel?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
