that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
