Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
We have so much sex to catch up on
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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