pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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