In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
