Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
Randomize
